How to change your life

My life was great when i was a kid. Then overtime it just started to fall apart. I never really thought about it, i told myself this was just how life worked. I was wrong. I've stayed up countless nightstrying to reason the cause of my suffering. What did i do to deserve this? Where did i go wrong? Why me? I was so desperate for change that i threw myself at spirituality. I wanted to know my purpose, i wanted knowledge and wisdom. I went from catholism to christianity. buddhism to wicca then chaos magic soon followed. I wanted power. If i was not blessed with what i thought i needed to succeed in life, then i would find something to replace it with. But i was wrong. A few years ago, maybe even months ago, i would hear what im about to say and call it bullshit, but i've not only seen it, i have experienced it. Trust in God. Thats all it takes. My life started falling apart when i realized i had to trust my parents to raise me, to trust my family to give me a home, to trust my fellow humans to give me a world. As you grow, you forget your past. You're told to forget your past. It's a big burden, but its one you should accept and carry. Dont forget where you come from and what you've been through. Never relive, never forget.